Recap From The Past Month

Not going to get into too much detail, for the sake that I would like to write a new post about recent stuff, but if I begin writing about something that deals with something that happened a month ago, I don't want anyone to be lost about what all is going on.

1. I was in a car accident September 30th. Got rear-ended by a drunk driver, and if you have me on Facebook, you can check out the photos. I have recently gotten a new car, in which is a 2012 Ford Fiesta, same color and everything except for the moon roof, but also includes ambient lighting, Sirius radio, and super-fuel package.
2. From the accident, I walked away with a broken finger and massive headaches/back/neck aches for about a week later.
3. Because of the accident, I fell behind in school...hardcore. It took me about three weeks to get caught up again, and when I finally got caught up, I fell behind again. Now that I'm caught up again...a month after the accident, I can stay this way for awhile. It would be nice not to stress so much.
4. The usual family drama has been abouts. Not going to go into any detail, I wouldn't want to ruin anything for anyone (family-wise).
5. The lovely ex-boyfriend had made a "master-plan" with his buddies to take the wheels off my car and put my car in cinder-blocks. I heard about this from a close friend approximately a week after the accident. Not sure if my ex is bright enough to realize that I had no car at the time for him and his friends to vandalize, I'm also not so sure if he knows that if he does do anything to my property - he'll have a hard time getting into the Marines and he'll have to pay for damages. And I'm not sure if he knows that I dedicated my summer to working - meaning, getting up early every weekday morning, when I could have been sleeping. So I earned what I have. Is he jelly much?
6. I honestly have been meaning to put up more posts...but truly have not had the time to write...or type...or whatever you want to say. I came up with some good posts too, I've just forgotten them all and simply have not had time. 

So...now that you know briefly what has happened, maybe any readers won't get too lost in what I'm trying to write about. And I'm pretty sure I only have three viewers...sooo yeah :\

It Is Indeed True

Who has heard the thing about eating sugar before you go to bed makes you have bad dreams?
I know I have, and unfortunately for me, I've had [even just a tiny bit of] sugar before bed and I had nightmares...for 4 nights in a row. Last night was finally my one night I slept decently good with pleasant dreams.

If you don't dream...That's okay, I would honestly rather just sleep and not dream than have nightmares.

This isn't going to be a very long post, considering I should be trying to sleep by now...
But I'm also waiting for my Hulu to buffer, haha.
So in the mean time, I just thought I would post up my own personal thought of the evening.

...Meh, why not just combine two thoughts into one post...?

So here's my dilemma:
I found out yesterday that my boyfriend is going out of the country next month for a mission trip to help orphans. What people do on the missions like that, I have no idea, for I have never done one.
But anyways, remember my post about California being so evil and taking everyone away from me?
Yeah well, he was gone for almost two weeks there. I try [or more so try not to] think about how in the hell I'm going to be able handle him being gone for long.
I almost lost my own sanity when he went to California [mainly because all I did was went to work, went home, eat, shower, sleep. Repeat cycle] But this time I have friends still here and school and whatnot.
I told him last night that the whole idea was really bothering me.
I mean, I know he's going for a good cause. And truly, good for him...I'm really proud of him.
But I did tell him I honestly didn't know how I could handle him being gone [OUT OF THE COUNTRY] I didn't know if I could stay with him for the time he's gone or not.

I asked a few friends what I should do to handle this situation, because of course it's going to be hard for me to deal with, it breaks my heart just thinking about him being gone and then our relationship starts to feel like an hour glass.
Well anyways, one of my friends told me I should take a break from him [in other words, break up until he gets back]. I don't want to do that...that would hurt both him and myself and probably ruin a lot of trust stuff, and I love him far too much to do that. Then another friend more so said they were sorry to hear that I have to go through that. But I think they were basically thinking...or telling me that I should deal with it. Logical choice. Wait until he gets back, and everything will be fine.

It truly just kills me to let him leave me [over and over and over again, I might add]...Well leave me in the sense of being elsewhere without me.
It brings me back to not expecting to have these feelings towards him and care for him as much as I really do, but I'm not going to go into all of that.
Anyhow. You, being my reader and all...what do you suppose I should do in this situation? I would just like to have other's opinions.

Anyways, I'm pretty sure Hulu is done buffering.
Goodnight all!

Popchips

A healthy food, that's all natural, and doesn't have any of the icky stuff that regular chips have. 

Is this a joke? 

Heck no!

I never really thought that Popchips would really be good, but yesterday I bought a bag and tried them out. 

THEY ARE AMAZING!

My kind of chip, definitely :)

And considering I'm sort of a health nut, I miss not being able to eat the junk food. 

But like I said. Popchips. The chips that are all natural (and healthy) and have a great taste, that substitute for the junk food chips. 

:)

Oh Hallelujah. 

Open To Feedback

I've been told, pretty recently, actually that when I rant, my rants aren't "long enough".
I truly do appreciate that a few of my readers, more so close friends, tell me their opinion about my blogs. It's extremely helpful, it takes me back to my Sophomore and Junior Language Arts classes, I had the same teacher for both years, and every time I wrote an essay I was always given feedback on what else to include, why, and to go deeper into my thoughts and words. I generally always thought that my writing had to be like my teacher's writing, long explanations, proving points to the very last strand. But I try to give myself some room to write what I feel and it doesn't have to be perfect.

I'm really going to try better at getting deeper into my thoughts so my readers (if I happen to even have any) can have a better understanding of what I'm talking about.
With that said (and I know I say those words a lot in these posts), let's try a rant for the day...Or night.

Example 1:
I'm not going to name any names, but let's go with Person A and Person B
Person A is a grumpier person, always has to be right, about everything. It's their way or no way. Oh and Person A is extremely rude and very self-centered.
Person B is a very calm person who truly does not like violence and tries their best to stay away from drama. They continuously try and try and do their best at everything, and when it comes to the saying "You are your biggest judge" It's 100% for them.

Anyhow, Person B has to go out of their way a lot to watch after other people and put their own things aside for another time. Person B is always using their time to wait after other people. But Person B has finally gotten to the point where they want to do things more so for themselves and have no worries. Person A, on the other hand is...well I'll just show you this face...

There, that basically explains it ^-^

(Credit to Google Images)

Anyways, Person B had their mind set and focused on one thing by the late afternoon, but one thing after another just had to come in their way and they never really got around to completing that one thing.
Person A was just nagging and nagging and nagging and always getting in the way of things and not really doing what they were supposed to be doing. It's like Person A went out of their way to be immature and make Person B feel like crap.

Person B finally had enough and blew up, was yelling and trying to make a point, but unfortunately Person A has a hard, thick skull where no one else's opinions or thoughts can get through to them. Person A told Person B to "Shut the [front door]" and that's really when Person B had enough. Unfortunately, just from that one little incident of all the stress building up and Person B blowing up over it, Person B may be getting grounded for a week and their car taken away...?

Wait...Car taken away...?
Let's rewind and go over the fact that Person B bought their car with their own money, they pay for their own gas, and their own money pays for their own insurance.

>>I want to know when the last case was with someone taking away someone else's car that the other person had paid fully with their own money, and the only reasoning the other other person had for taking away the car was "You live under in my house, therefore my rules."
Hmmmm...Let's say ummm...NEVER...?<<

Back to the story, Person B follows the rules, does everything they are told to do, and do it when they're told. Always home early. Watching an elementary kid, and keeping up with their own school work. Responsibilities much? Oh, forgot to add that Person B also has to be the one to pick up after [let's say Person C's] responsibilities. So we all know now that Person B is a very mature, and responsible person.
But just over one little blow-up Person B gets the hammer...Big time.
>Let's review the fact, No one I repeat, NO ONE has the right to take away another person's belongings, unless there is suspicion and illegal elements involved (and that would usually only be the police).<

So tell me...What the f***?!
Just from listening to this story, I'm completely baffled by this situation.
I'm just going to say that Person A has zero respect for others and (oh gosh) I could go on. Person A is an ass, 'nough said.

I think I have lost my train of thought, and yes (if you are the humorous type) my train has crashed.

Well anyways, looking back up and reminding myself that the title is 'Open To Feedback', anyone...and I mean...ANYONE who reads my blog are more than welcome to comment or anything really, and give me feedback on my blog posts and what would make it more enjoyable for YOU to read. I will say now, I do try to include my every explanation I have, but if there's more you'd like to know...Just tell me :)

Lack Of Communication

...I thought it was bad in men, but oh gosh...
Do you need a group of people who don't communicate directions or information very well??
SHHS would be the place to go for that!

With a new school year starting, of course Freshmen have their first day and then the upperclassmen have their first day with the Freshmen, and our very [very] messed up bell schedule we have 7-period classes on Mondays, Tuesdays, and Fridays. What happened to Wednesdays and Thursdays? Oh yeah, we have block periods with PRIDE period both days...but I'm not done yet...We also have early release on Wednesdays [which used to only be on Fridays, last year]
To add...Not even the counselors know what the bell schedule is for this week.

If you don't know why I'm on such a rage about this...Let's take a look at the bell schedule the past 3 years:

My Freshmen year [2008-2009]: It was just a nice block schedule, with early release Fridays. The only problem was, all students were stuck with a tutorial class...A class that we sit in for an hour and a half and not get ANY credit for. Everyone could deal with that amazing bell schedule, including the tutorial time, because it was truly just social time :)
This was better known as the best schedule evar!

Sophomore year [2009-2010]: All the amazingness changed to the boring 7-period bell schedule...all day, every day. At the end of my Freshmen year, I did start a petition to keep the block schedule. Turns out we didn't have enough signatures and no one knew when the big board meeting was [not very well thought out plan]. This is why no one ever has good memories of their Sophomore year in high school *sigh*

Junior year [2010-2011]: Oh how the school board thought it would be just fantastic to have a 7-period bell schedule...mixed with a PRIDE period on Thursdays, block schedule for Thursdays and Fridays, and early release Fridays. This was probably the next best bell schedule compared to my Freshmen year. Oh, and PRIDE periods were equivalent to the tutorial periods...But this time, we only had 30 minutes of work time and it was still not accredited.

Senior year [2011-2012]: Like I said way above...
Mondays, Tuesdays, and Fridays we have regular 7-period class schedule.
Wednesdays we have 2nd, PRIDE, 4th, Lunch, and 6th periods, plus early release.
Thursdays we have 1st, PRIDE, 3rd, Lunch, 5th, and 7th periods.

It's honestly so much better to have early release on Fridays and not waste students' time with putting us in PRIDE period...two times a week this year!

Reason for the school changing the schedule just about every year, I've been going to school here...?
It saves money.
-.-

I could on and on about the financial problems our school has had. Oh gosh. But I don't want to get started on that...plus I have some other important things to do tonight.
Upperclassmen: have a good last-day-of-summer evening :)

St. Helens Parkour

Better known as, SHPK. 

Awesome group of people, we're just trying to spread the word and get more recognized. 

If you happen to have a Facebook or anything, like us on there :) 

http://www.facebook.com/pages/SHPK/216466145076415?sk=wall

Sleep Deprivation

I know I've written a few posts about being sleep deprived.
In all honesty, I was getting enough sleep to get me through the day.
But yesterday and today...I think I reached my highest point of being sleep deprived.

It truly sucks (sorry for my lack of use of creative words)
I've gotten to the point where I'm so tired that I'm about to pass out, and be so nauseated that I can barely stand the thought of eating something. To add, it's to the extreme that my eyes are glossy and nearly bloodshot.

Solution: Go to bed early.

...Easier said than done -.-

I have yet to write an essay for a college application.
So! With that said, I hope you enjoyed my post and I need to get onto writing that essay

>>>>Looking over this about a week later, I realize that my college application has absolutely NOTHING to do with being sleep deprived! Haha. I guess that's what I get for not getting any sleep...I feel sorry for my viewers who end up reading a bunch of nonsense.

But anyways...Focus back to the main point of this post. I discovered (and will take all responsibility) for being out late and not coming home until later (not too late, like 11 or midnight) and on top of that, I need to get up at 5 am for my morning workout and get ready for work, which I need to be there by about 7 am...Not getting done until 2 or even 3 pm...That's about the time I finally want to get out and hang out with friends and have fun...only realizing that I only have a couple of hours to hang out (after i get done getting ready and all) until I have to be back at home...repeating the cycle. Oh how life is just full of awesomeness.

And I like how I cancel out my editing-a-sleep-deprived-post with being sleepy...Makes total sense!

Waiting

Most of us people spend a great amount of our lives just waiting.
Waiting for the sun to set, waiting for someone to come along and sweep us "off our feet", waiting to get time with a loved one, waiting for an event that may never happen, waiting for others to change their minds.
...You get the idea, right?
Yet, about 90% of that waiting just turns out to be a waste of time. (I'd know from personal experience)
I've wasted so much of my life and time so far, by just waiting. Waiting for anything, really. But I always get left with disappointment.
And for some reason, I never learn from that one thing. I just continue to wait - but of course not for the same things from previous times.

I always tell myself, 'Tomorrow is another day' or 'Soon I'll no longer be waiting'.
For unknown reasons that "tomorrow" always has to be put off until another "tomorrow" and then another and another, and as soon as I know it, I'm waiting for weeks just to tell someone something or waiting for something new to happen.

Sometimes people can only wait so long and the things they want to say start to be turned into a "big deal", so some of us just give up on waiting. Some of us actually stick it out and wait for such a long time for that right moment to say a few words. And some of us wait until the situation becomes a "big deal"...but by that time rolls around, they could care less about the topic and it's pointless and has no meaning anymore.

Men...Don't keep women waiting.
Women...Don't keep men waiting for too long.

Actually, let's all just stop waiting and wasting time on something useless...of course, unless it's important.
But waiting for a long period of time, sometimes turns out not to be worth it.

As for me, I'm going to continue to wait and wait for the right moment to say/do something. But I definitely won't wait too long...or else by then, it's lost its own meaning. For the important stuff, I'll wait. For the not-so-important stuff, I'll move on and not waste my time.

Leave The Lies To The Liars

Everyone says: "Once a liar, always a liar."
But is it really true?

Personally, I used to lie...ALOT. But the past few years I figured that there's no point in lying if I truly have to go out of my way that much just to make sure a specific story is true - or makes sense. Obviously, telling the truth is so much more easier, and I don't really do anything wrong anymore...so there's truly no reason for me to lie. haha.

But the people who lie and lie and lie....and lie about the smallest things ever.
My brother for example. He will lie about taking a freaking cookie. "You've got the chocolate all over your face, and crumbs all around you, sorry bro...but you're not getting away with that one."
No matter what...he will continue to make up an entire story.

For reals this time...I don't really understand as to why people lie so much.
Let's say you've had a history with someone and you get told information from some close people and then question the former...important person about that information...but they lie, and make the explanation seem so believable, and they frame themselves as such a "perfect" person...until you remember the evidence you have to "back up" what they just told you.
Then finding out that they lied about something so little just seems to be so frustrating. Why go through that much trouble just to create a lie?

I could stress about it so much as to ...Why.
But for now, let's just leave the lies to the liars and not get wrapped up in their games.
The less drama. The better.

Time To Think About School...Again.

Time has seemed to be going by pretty quickly, and ironically enough...it's time to think about school again.
Well...it's just a good thing for me that it's (finally) my senior year.
The last...but generally best year in high school.
I just dislike the fact of thinking that I have to go back and register in about three weeks, and having to see my old classmates...especially the ones who don't like me and I don't like them. haha.

But it's time for us all to just grow up, sooner or later. Fortunately for me, it was sooner. I stopped caring about those people my sophomore year.
Anyhow, all my hard work is starting to pay off to my last year.
Crazy to think that it's already that time again.

California

Yeah, may seem like the best place to go right now.
Although I've never been there, seems like that's where everyone is going these days.
First, one of my closest friends...not coming back until the end of August.
Then my sister's husband is stuck there for about two more weeks.
Lastly, my boyfriend is there and won't be returning for a few more days...*sigh*

I'm disappointed in California right now.

Summer Beginnings & Endings.

It generally takes about a month for summer to kick in for me, especially if the weather has been how it is in Oregon -.-
And by the time I'm finally starting to enjoy my summer...school crap is coming back up! D:
We have a little over a month left for summer, school stuff shouldn't be concerned about for another 2 or 3 weeks :/
Fortunately for me, I'm going to be having half-days all year next year. Plus it's my senior year :D
It's just lame how summer finally decides to kick in...then we all have to start thinking about school again.
Not cool, Oregon...

The Really Annoying Thing.

Blog posts can be like Facebook status updates.

Once you get used writing a new blog post often, it starts to get addicting.
Like you have to say everything that's on your mind.
And a new thought comes to mind every time you get done publishing a new post.
So instead of going back and putting all those thoughts into one post, and make everything confusing for the reader...Just make a new post :D

...I'm just trying to get to a total of 30 posts...

Realization Of The Day

I've come to realize that most of my posts don't make a lot of sense.
Sorry to those who are reading my blog and get lost about what I'm trying to write about.
I'm half-asleep most of the time, so I'll just end up saying whatever comes to mind while trying my best to have it all make sense.

:)

Work & No Sleep

Oh, how we all gotta love the stages of adulthood.
Although I'm not quite an adult yet, I'm still getting a taste of how it all feels.
Having a job is nice, get money, need to make time for friends and boyfriend, and right when we all thought we were invincible...The sleepy monster comes and ruins everything! Gah :/

Haha, I truly wish I could always have the right amount of energy, everyday.
I'd never have to sleep.
I'd never have to cancel plans to sleep.
I'd never have to stress about sleeping so less or too much (too much on the weekends).
I'd never have to cut out extra time to sleep.

Life would be wonderful!

Reality check...
I've been drained the past few weeks.
Never really got time to sleep enough :/
And now, even though it's still light out, I finally get the chance to get some sleep :)
I'm definitely going to take that chance.

Cheers to an early night :)
Goodnight Inter web, Facebook, and Blogging world.

Bi-Polar Oregon

If anyone has ever lived in Oregon, then you would know what I'm talking about.

It's freaking summer time. And what do us Oregonians get for a week...?
Yep, bi-polar weather -.-

One day it's nice and sunny. The next few days it rains.
Then the very next day, it's warm...then rains...then the sun comes out, then some more sprinkle rain, then blistering heat, and then it downpours!

...really...?

And currently, it's raining.
Oh, but wait...tomorrow 'til Thursday it's supposed to be nice and sunny and warm.
I'm sort of getting tired of it, along with a bunch of other people lol.

Thoughts For Tonight

I don't want to feel like I've made a mistake in my choices.
I don't ever want to feel the "what-if?" factor.
No regrets.
I always want something that's going to last.
And when I worry, I absolutely don't want to think of abstract thoughts and excuses for a certain scenario.

Yup.

Procrastination

It happens to the best of us.

We try, but then feel like our very own brain cells are fried and disappearing.

So we look for something else to do, and of course that becomes a distraction and so on.

Something New

Ever wish life had some sort of redo button...?
Or even some way to just start out new and fresh...?

Haha, I wish that were the case.
I truly wish there was some sort of button that I could easily press (like the "easy" button) to start my day out on a new page.

Unfortunately, life gives us something to work towards and build up to.
...Sort of like relationships...(You should've known this all had something to do about relationships, haha)
Sometime it's something new and you just have to work up to it, sometimes very slowly, but hopefully in the process there's something good in return for all that hard work.

Maybe like careers...? Yeah, we all know how that one plays out.

Or even just regular, everyday life.
Same routine...but there possibly might be a new goal for each day.

That last thought leads us to summer.
Oh, the dreaded thoughts of "what ever will I do today...?!"
My main goal is to not let this summer be dull, like it already has been -_-
It's been 3 weeks of summer already...and mine has consisted of:
♦ Working
♦ Getting a new car
♦ Going camping
♦ Taking some photos
♦ Hanging out a bit
♦ Last but not least, trying to build up to something better in this (almost 2 month old) relationship.
...And of course all of this has to lead back to relationships...lol.

Anyhow, I think I might've made my point...Need to start off everyday with something new and exciting :) or at least have more fun.
And if you happen to be one of those people who don't understand what I'm trying to get across here...that's okay, I'm already aware of the fact that my post may be all jumbled and full of random thoughts.

The Weekend After.

Everything seemed just fine a few days ago, but now everything seems to be on edge.
...But what happened...?

Why do things seem so much more different now and out of place...?
Maybe this isn't how it's supposed to be...?
Is there something missing, or does lost time need to be made-up...?

A quote I kind of made up over the weekend was:
"Romance is more than just passion.
Passion is more than just love."

It got me thinking about how much of a romantic I am.
Not to sound all sappy or anything, but all I really want is to just find love again.
Like I said before, being in love and loving someone is amazing, it would just be nice to have the feeling back because I love to love and I can be a very passionate person.

But thinking about this again brings me back to an earlier post...
How do you know you love someone?
How do you know for a fact that's what you want?
How do you know the feeling is true?

I'm just in wonder about all this.

But for now I'll shove the nightmares aside and close my eyes to dream of something better.

Summer Camping

Never once did I think that almost everyone would plan on going camping the last weekend in June...and the same four days.
Now let's just hope all of us people don't happen to be at the same place...that would be a good and bad thing.
I know that I'll be at the beach. Pretty awesome.
Others may be out in the middle of nowhere in the hills...they can have fun up there, I personally like civilization.
The difference there is between this summer and past summers for me, is that I'm not going camping with my own family. Which is pretty cool. Camping with friends and their families, and boyfriend, a whole new experience...Big difference than with my own family.

And another thing to add, I'm still awake...especially when I shouldn't be.
I don't have work or anything in the morning...But I still have to be awake pretty early.
I'm done packing for the most part, just a few things here and there.
And I'm filling this post up with random, pointless thoughts.

Anyways...goodnight world, hope ya'll have an awesome weekend and a great summer :)

Another Post About Love

...Now that I love someone (Yes, I am absolutely sure about it) And yes, it is the Garrett.
I'm more afraid of backing down, only for the sake of me being afraid of getting hurt.
I've had a lot of hurt in relationships, and if something like that happens to me again, especially right now...I'm not sure if I'd be able to handle it :/
It's a major thing I never tend to think about when I get involved in a new relationship, because who is ever ready to get hurt by some one you care a lot about? Although, I do admit that at the beginning of all of this, I was ready to be hurt because I never expected to find love in all this. But of course, plans (ALWAYS) change.

Feelings that I'm well-associated with: Fear and pain.

Yup.

Summer

Well, I guess it's a little late now, considering most of us are a whole week or two into summer.
And I've realized that I haven't posted in a long time.
Ummm....well, let's go with (at least 10) goals for summer:

1. Go golfing with at least one other person.
2. Spend lots of time with my lover and keep this relationship going good. ♥
3. Take more great photos to add to my photography album.
4. Travel outside of town and maybe a little out of state. (Go to many places)
5. Get a job. Fortunately, I got a job the day after my last day of school.
6. Get ma Fiesta :)
7. Improve with the band.
8. Attend Three Days Grace concert. (Already have tickets, so I must!)
9. Make a few new friends.
10. Have an amazingly awesome summer!
11. Ghost Hunting!!!

Yeah, I don't really have much to say, but I can update whoever actually reads my blog as to what I'm doing at this moment.

Listening to music (The Moment by Safetysuit).
                 [Haha, ironic ^^]
Writing this.
And thinking about stuff :)

I do wish everyone an awesomely awesome summer. Don't go a day with nothing to do! Don't mope around if something bad happens! Make it a fun-filled summer :)

Oh, and congrats to the class of 2011!!!!

Finding New Love

Generally, adults tell us teenagers that we're "too young to be in love", we "don't know what love is..."
Well...I do know that love is. I've been in love before, it's probably one of the most amazing feelings ever.
But I do miss being in love. I so badly want to be in love again, to mean something to someone and them mean a lot of something to me, to be able to say "I love you" to that special person, to care for someone - for them to care for me. To be able to show affection towards someone without feeling like a...yeah (I'm not sure what word would be best), because when you love someone, you know that you have no shame in showing affection to them.

The words are so easy to say.
Don't get me wrong, I would definitely say it to someone, but I want to wait longer and make sure it comes from the deepest part of my heart, and have the full meaning behind it.
Because it just seems like saying "I love you" would make everything better.

I know that "I love you" could be a variety of different meanings...And I'm hoping everyone here knows I'm talking about the romantic-like, because I have no problem saying "I love you" to my best friends, because I love my friends...Just only as friends and not in a crazy romantic way.
But like I said earlier...I so badly want to be in love again, to be that happy (although, I am very happy now), to say "I love you" to someone and not have it all be an awkward thing, to show someone that I love them.

Why do the words have to be so easy to say in my mind, but out loud they would seem so out of place?
I know it's possible to someday...sooner or later...say that I love this person, very much. Just not now...My only question is...Why?!...BLAH...

>>Goodnight world<<

Regret

Yeah, I could basically make a long list of things I regret from over the past year.
Regret is probably one, out of the many, worst feelings ever.
The best thing to do when you regret something is to stay as far away from the memories/feeling as possible...Especially if you're an easily hurt person.
But mainly in this case, that's easier said than done.

I do have to admit, I gave up a lot.
But I also have to admit that I gave in a lot and gave certain people second chances they never should've deserved.
I trusted people I never should've trusted.
I got involved with people I never should've gotten involved with.
And come to think of it, I always get hurt the most in the end.
On the bright side - I got what I wanted, I'm happy, I've gained back a lot of positive things in life and lost almost all the negatives.

The only thing I hope is for the same words to not get said, unless they have 100% meaning behind them.

Another Doomsday FAIL!

As promised, I came back to write a new post about surviving this day.

It was funny, because earlier today I was driving to my friend's house and nearly every car I passed was going to opposite way I was and I actually saw people packing up their cars...Failure at it's best.

So anyhow...The next "Doomsday" is...of course, 2012.
Will it happen? Maybe, maybe not.
I'm supposed to graduate next year...Sooo, I'm going to call B.S. on it happening.
Well, not much more for this post.
All this irony is quite entertaining. (Yeah, that sentence may not make sense...but it makes me feel better)
:)

BUT...the biggest thing I saw today that could've made anyone concerned was this:

Yep...A big angry RAIN CLOUD!

Yeah...It's funny now, because it's been raining all day and now it's sunny!! WOOHOO! Gotta love this day ♥

5.21.11

Judgement Day...?
Doomsday...?
Apocalypse...?
End Of The World...?
Rapture...?

Well, I'll try my best not to offend anyone who may believe that this is going to happen.
Personally...I don't believe it.
If it does, oh boy, am I screwed...Guess I'm going to be left behind and watch the world fall apart in self-destruction mode.
If it seriously is going to happen, wouldn't everyone be packing things up, running around, cancelling plans, etc?

Apparently the world is going to be destroyed by multiple earthquakes and disasters on Saturday May 21st, 2011 @ 6:00 pm (worldwide).

How was this calculated...?
Harold Camping, a preacher who heads Family Radio - a worldwide religious broadcasting concern - predicted over a bunch of silly numbers that Saturday (tomorrow) will be the day that we all either live in eternity...or die in the destruction of the world.
More info here

If, by the slight chance this will all happen, it is the PERFECT excuse for nearly every teenager across the world to throw a friggin' party and completely destroy themselves...and maybe for adults as well - heck, I could always just skip school Monday and have people say I have been "saved" and that's why I shall never return to school again, haha. Not gonna waste time doing that.
And if, by the greatest chance it doesn't happen, we're basically giving a bunch of money to churches - supposedly "buying" a ticket to heaven...or just giving money in order to save the world. (in link above)

I don't want to say too much, but this sounds like the greatest scam for businesses to get money, people to throw outrageous parties, and for some people to have an excuse to finally "pack-up" and "leave".

In my opinion - as I have already said, I do not believe this will happen. I have a future planned, there's places I'm going to go to, there's many people I'm going to meet, and I have a life to live.
Another reason...wouldn't schools, businesses, and other majoy groups be cancelling everything...?

*Sigh*
*Thinks*
..............
*Smacks face in disbelief*

I don't think I have anything else to say.
It's one of those topics that you could go on and on talking about, and I am not going to do that.
Soooooo....I guess I have a little over 24 hours to live.
If I make it through the next 24 hours, I'll post up about how friggin' ignorant and insane this whole...thing...is!
...And if I don't live...Well, the internet always survives. So my blog will always be here. haha.

School Sleep-Over

...NEVER do it.
No matter how "awesome" it may sound...If it's raining...and windy...and cold...Just save your soul and don't go...Especially if it's an outside event.

Basically, there was an event called "Sleep Less For M.S."...I think that's what it was called.
And groups got together and put up tents in the high school football field and walked around the track...all night - sorta like a Relay For Life or March of Dimes event, but with high school.
I'm sure that it was optional to sleep, if of course, people were too tired.
Music was playing all night...the annoying rap crap.
But It was fun to just spend time with my friends and also have time with my boyfriend.

Back to my main point, and to make everything short...
If you would like your shoes stolen, have to listen to rap crap all night and listen to people being annoying, but being able to spend time with your close friends, and also being up all night and packing things up at the crack of dawn...DO IT!

I'm not sure if any of this post makes sense, considering I'm half asleep while typing this and my brain is practically moosh. But if it makes sense...then yeah....

Happy Birthday [to me]

I must've gotten nearly 30 (or more by now) "happy birthday"'s on Facebook.
I've heard that 17 is one of the greatest years, I didn't think I would believe it until today, and I'll make sure to make it one amazing year before I enter adulthood.

♫Happy Birthday♫ was sang to me 4 times today.
1- In choir.
2- In choir again, but as a polka!
3- At lunch.
4- In one of my other classes.

I wished for one thing when I blew out my imaginary birthday candle-My wonderful friends and boyfriend got me a cake at lunch-And I'm hoping that wish comes true :)
Don't ask what the wish is...Well, maybe only one person may ask...But I'm not sure if it'll come true. If it does, my birthday is complete :)

Well...Have a good May 9th (or even birthday) to the rest of you.
My life could not get any better than this.
♥

Garrett Kessner

WOOHOO! Garrett. This post is meant just for you lol.

I could tell you everything now, and have you read it later...
OR....I could just tell you things in person.
Maybe a little bit of both??
BWAHAHAHAHA, you never know :P

I guess I'll start with the fact that you have a hold of my heart ♥

As you already know, you make me REALLY (x's infinity) happy.
One thing I truly wish is for us to talk more and hang out more, but that's for surely happening soon.

I've told you millions of times how attractive you are :)
You're definitely someone I'd want a lasting relationship with, but that's your say.
One major question I do have is, what happens when you graduate? Is this all going to end and am I going to be forgotten?

I'm just taking one day at a time to see how things turn out.

It takes a lot of courage for me to say things like this, but I mean it :)

Well...to end this post on a positive note-you're awesome :)
Oh. And I have granted you with the nickname: Butterfly :D
Lol, and I'm hoping you know how you got that one.

L.O.V.E

[Warning to reader: If this starts to sound too mooshy...whatever lol. Then stop reading.]

I may seem like a hopeless-romantic but, what is love?
Does it mean having strong feelings for someone and just can't avoid that?
Or does it mean needing to have someone in your life...All the time?

What I have to say is, I'm not in love-atleast I don't think I am.
I have extremely strong feelings for someone and he gives me butterflies and makes me smile and is just insanely attractive.
But I know for a fact that I couldn't tell him I love him.
Maybe as time goes by...Of course, depending on if we're still together or not.

I do know that when I was "in love", in a recently past relationship, I didn't get butterflies or constantly smiling when he was around.

So my question still stands.
What is love?

How do you know you're in love?
What if the time you're in love, is the time that you couldn't say it to that person?

I'm not in denial or anything.
It just wouldn't seem right to tell him at the moment.
Of course, only time could tell.
So obviously not now.

I do know that whatever this feeling is...It's great.
It makes me happy and there's usually never a moment where a smile doesn't leave my face.

On The Rocks

Soooo you're probably wondering why I titled this post 'On The Rocks' and "who/what the heck does that refer to?!"

First, let me inform you that they are a guys A Cappella group from U of O (University of Oregon)

Probably sounds pretty boring to you. But to me-considering I'm an awesome little choir nerdo-they're like the best A Cappella group to listen to-that's of course, if you dig the guys.

Anyways, I went to their concert last Saturday (4.2.11) in Portland, and although neither Jonah Seitz or Jake Jepson performed with the group...they were still pretty B.A.

In all honesty, there's so much more I could say about the group-mainly "oh my god!"-So to make it a bit easier, if you're interested, please be my guest and seek out more information.

And now is probably the time you're wondering who Jonah and Jake are...?

Jonah, only the BEST man to watch sing and dance. 'Nough said. Haha.

Jake....It's a long story. He's just an amazing person.

If any of those names sound familiar, then GOOD! I'd hate for anyone to be clueless about who I'm talking about.

So finally, I'll show you a few examples of just how amazing they are...Enjoy :)

And just to add a bit more, in case you haven't noticed, does the main singer (Jonah) in 'Pour Some Sugar On Me' look familiar?? Well....yeah, at the OTR concert my friends and I kind of mobbed the poor guy, and well....we just got a picture or two with him :)

Road-Rage

Are you one of those drivers that follow the law, are considerate of other drivers/pedestrians? Or are you just one of those drivers that got their license out of a Cracker Jack box and don't give a damn?

Here's the thing: If you're the kind of driver who actually cares, good for you :) this world needs more careful, respectful drivers like you.

As for the Careless-I-Don't-Give-A-Damn drivers: Watch yourselves. No I it's not a threat, I'm just simply saying that if you keep driving like that, sooner or later you're gonna get your pretty little car (or junk-yard POS) crunched up. If you're really going to get pissed off because some other driver is respectful of other people, expect people to not give a damn about you, especially if you're in a situation where you really need help. Because you see; if you're going to have road-rage because of an everyday blocked up road, take a detour! Especially if you're in that much of a hurry to get home or whatever. The roads during the after-school hours are ALWAYS blocked up. Don't expect anything different.

My conclusion: Don't be stupid. *rolls eyes* you choose to be an idiot, don't expect people to give a damn. Trust me, karma's a real b****. And when I get my new car, I'll be one of those respectful drivers-heck! I already am! So if you see me around; expect nothing but a smile and wave :)

Quotes

Favorite quotes, inspirational, what I find funny, etc.

1. "Artificial intelligence is no match for natural stupidity." -Unknown author
2. "Some people should be around your entire life, and others should just make an appearance." -Greek (at least, that's where I got it from)

r.e.s.p.e.c.t

I'm starting to realize that a lot of people in school, or everywhere for that matter, have zero respect for others. And as I'm sitting there watching all the craziness go about, I try so hard to hold my tongue and not shout at the top of my lungs for people to shut up!

Example #1: The teacher is talking in class-trying to educate us kids-and everyone just sits there and messes around on their phones, make distracting movement or sounds, or just simply don't stop talking. It's like you're the 1 out of 99% of people in there that's actually respectful and actually wants to learn something new, or better yet, pass the dang class and move one more step towards graduation. In all honesty, I feel sorry for the teachers I have and no one else has respect for them-they deserve better than that.

Example #2: Somebody new comes into the school-like a guest speaker-and tells their story and all that about what they're trying to get through people's minds, and nobody has the common-sense to realize that they need to show some respect and listen? It truly makes me feel terrible, as well as embarrassed by the fact that my classmates can't act like the young adults they are and be quiet! I mean, what kind of first impression is that?! Especially to a guest speaker! ...haha, like they'd ever want to come back and see us again. Thank you, immature high schoolers, you just scared away another person! Even the freshman can show us up by being quiet.

"Hello, School board! Can we please import a sergeant or something to get the rest of these kids back in line??"